Every one of us craves to be noticed or to be applauded. We were all raised to be competitive and to make something out of ourselves. We all grew up believing that being admired for achievements or for physical attributes made us feel really good about ourselves. We all want to be a SOMEBODY, someone who everybody could look up to, someone who everybody wants to be and someone who gets to have that “prized poney.”

Who doesn’t want to be admired?

No one.

I recently started my Registered Nurse (RN) Program and I will say that it’s been very tough. It’s very hard to concentrate and it’s so hard to be on top of things because professors throw readings and homework assigns left and right. They pressure us to get into groups and establish a connection with our peers because they all believe that down the road, we will all become “bestest friends.”

Yeah right.

For the past two weeks, I have noticed that a lot of students are trying too hard to stand out. They all want to be that student who gets the “A.” They like to suck up to the teacher, despite how horrible the teacher’s jokes are. I mean… how can I establish connections with people who strive too hard to be someone?

To be honest, I think it’s just me being very insecure. I feel inadequate, as if I’m not trying hard enough to be that motivated student I see in each class. I mean, I do my homework, but I barely read.  I do pay attention in class to the point that I will try so hard to arrive in class 30 minutes early (which doesn’t always happen), just to get in front of the class. If I don’t get the seat in front, I GO MENTALLY BALISTIC inside.

Also, it doesn’t help that I have a “baby face.” I look like I’m 19 and people in my class (almost all of them are 25+) do not take me seriously. I know the answer but half the time, they don’t listen to me- they have to re-check and look at the book. UGH.

I tell all these frustrations I have to Ricky. He told me that I shouldn’t be insecure and that I should always be pacing myself. Who cares if I don’t get to be the teacher’s pet? Or if I didn’t get an A in the class? As long as I’m in my own pace, doing what I need to do, then I’ll be okay. I look at Ricky and he does make sense. He went through his own MLT program concentrating on his own thing and didn’t care what other people do or think. He focused in his own stuff and now he’s working in a lab at a hospital and pursuing his Biology major in the university. What a role model huh? He left his own mark and he’s someone I look up to.

So, in conclusion to my ranting, I should focus on my thing and let the others do whatever they want. After all, we all want to be somebody, but it doesn’t mean that we all have to be the same.