I’m probably the craziest girlfriend he’d ever have.
I throw hurtful words and carelessly push him away when he didn’t do anything wrong.
I’m such a bitch to do all that especially when I’m PMSing.
I always say sorry.
But I always make things far worse.
I hate hurting him.
But I always do anyway.
And yet, he never left me.
I am very lucky to be with him- who’s willing to stay and work things out.
I’m glad that he spares his time on me even though he’s very busy.
He makes sure that I’m always alright.
He knows when I’m upset or something is bothering me.
And sometimes, I wish he didn’t.
But it’s in his nature to care, to love, to forgive, to forget.
I love all that about him.
I admit that there are a few instances that I doubt if I would end up being loyal to him.
Temptation is a bitch.
I can’t say that it has been a perfect relationship, but it had some of its rough and soft edges.
There are times when one or two guys would come along and find an interest with me,
Sometimes I wonder if it’s worth leaving Ricky to try and give them a chance.
I had a few doubts if I’ll be committed with Ricky.
But when I’ve imagined myself in a situation where I will be unfaithful:
Leaving Ricky for the sake of giving chances to guys who come along,
Beginning a new relationship with a new personality,
Going through the perfect 3 months and ending it within that same time,
Dating new guys all over again,
Finding the same personality: nice at first then becomes an asshole when things get worse.
When things doesn’t work out,
Start dating again because the other two guys weren’t like Ricky:
Ricky never left me even if I pushed him away.
Ricky knew when I’m upset and he knew how to cheer me up.
Ironically, in the end, I’ll be looking for Ricky’s personality in those guys.
I’ll be asking for Ricky to come back.
Bottom line is,
Cheating on Ricky will be my biggest mistake
And the most unforgiving sin that I will carry to my grave.
That’s how precious Ricky is to me
Too precious to leave him
Too precious to break him
Too precious because I love him.
He doesn’t know it,
But he’s perfect.
Perfect in his own ways.
I can’t lose him.
Because I know,
Ricky is definitely one in a million.