My best mentors in life, whether they know it or not, are my ex boyfriends/ ex partners and my former intimate acquaintances. They are all bastards who broke my heart, who taught me that the sweetest revenge is to rise and to prove my worth to them. Also, they created a monster that would eventually master their mind games and tricks.
I never regret dating every single one of them. I never regret sharing my life, my kisses and even my love for each and every one of them. Never. I never regret telling them “I miss you” or “I love you.” I never regret wasting my time in getting ready every single day just to look good for them. Never. I never regret satisfying them in bed even if sometimes I couldn’t even go on climax. I never regret playing with any one of them who may have a small, medium, pencil head, gigantic, or fat penis. Never. I never regret dating any one of them who never showered, who was inborn with some kind of stink disease, and who wore the same underwear for three days. I never regret dating any one of them who took me out on a top-notched restaurant only to find out that we had to share a dish, or the bill, or even the doggy- bags. Never. Because all of them helped me in creating a list of what-not- to want from a guy.
Men often complain that us gals are too picky and are mostly armed with a standard list of the “Ideal Guy.” We couldn’t blame ourselves because, well, most guys are simply put, animals; literally speaking. We, women, were born to believe that just like in Disney fairy tales, men are gentlemen who can sweep us off our feet with romantic getaways and gallivant rides with white horses. We, women, expect too much only to come into a conclusion that it takes kissing several frogs before we can find our so-called Prince Charming.
We, women, learn to keep a list to weed out the good from the bad. We keep a standard list of what we want from men because we do not want to fall back in our faces- head face straight to the ground. Of course, we do not only make a list of what we want out of our potential next boyfriends, but we also make a list of what we need to improve on ourselves.
I learned from Will that men love competition and they hate easy, clingy and dependent women. Through dating Dave, I learned to keep my life in balance and not to devote all my time on a boyfriend. I learned from Howie not to sleep with a guy after two dates; that’s being easy. Through dating Ian, I learned not to be with a guy who couldn’t satisfy me sexually. I learned from Beppe that no matter how much a woman desires to be the top priority of a man, that will never happen because he believes that his career matters before her. Through dating Mr. Nit-Picky, I learned that friends-with benefits do not work in making two people fall in love, because eventually one of them will have to take the bullet and leave.
Heartbreaks are there for a purpose: to give the heart a boost to sustain and build its own ego. The true purpose of heartaches isn’t to make a person heartless, but to make a person smarter in choosing for a prospective lifetime partner.
Sincerely, I want to give thanks to all the men who broke my heart. Without them, I wouldn’t be able to learn and find myself along the process.